Families were simply designed to be together. In spite of all the familiarity that is known to breed contempt, there's something comforting about all that stuff just because you're in. We've known it, we've tasted it, we've felt it in our family, and there's no greater moment of such but at the Holiday Season. For us, for me, it's rarely recognized while in the midst of it, but almost always elevated when broken apart. When the whole is no longer whole, all of the sudden you realize there's a hole. Then you have to relearn how to be a family without being complete as a family. And no matter how hard you try, nothing seems to fill the void until you're all together again. Then, once you are, the stuff of families gets elevated again, and you wonder whether the whole really is whole... but it is, and that's the way it is.
Like most families right about now, we're breaking apart. The presents unwrapped, the trimmings dry, the lights dimmed are signals of something to come - the end. The end of togetherness as we treasure it most, the end of just being as we rest in it most. Barret traversing back to collegiate studies in another land was the blinding signal of just that. His heart sinking at the thought of the impending "good-byes" and our hearts breaking at the thought of the impending distance reminds us that community was perfectly designed to fulfill the longing of forever togetherness. No matter how magical isolation, quiet and "freedom" may sound, the beauty of connectedness is always far superior.
With gentle kisses on the cheeks of sleeping sisters and mother, Barret whispered his "good-byes" in the darkness of the morning hours and is now in flight back to his college campus. The home's a little quieter now, a little more empty, a little sad - all reminders that families were simply designed to be together. And while we'll never really all be together again under one roof and under every season, we long for the soon-to-be shorter ones that will inevitably be separated by the longer ones - at least until the final, the ultimate forever-one.
To quote Willow this morning, "Barret's going to be gone for a long time... that's just the way it is."
Families were simply designed to be together. In spite of all the familiarity that is known to breed contempt, there's something comforting about all that stuff just because you're in. We've known it, we've tasted it, we've felt it in our family, and there's no greater moment of such but at the Holiday Season. For us, for me, it's rarely recognized while in the midst of it, but almost always elevated when broken apart. When the whole is no longer whole, all of the sudden you realize there's a hole. Then you have to relearn how to be a family without being complete as a family. And no matter how hard you try, nothing seems to fill the void until you're all together again. Then, once you are, the stuff of families gets elevated again, and you wonder whether the whole really is whole... but it is, and that's the way it is. 
1 comment:
My daughter and I were just discussing this topic the other day. I often wonder if it was intended to be this way. I understand the leaving and cleaving part, but has our culture just accepted that it's perfectly acceptable to transfer men (which includes their family), and leave behind family ties and extended family? Don't get me wrong, I love having the house to just Gene and me, because I know that, my adult children and their families live w/in shouting distance (that's a bit of hyperbole). And, I really wouldn't want my kids to live w/me again now that they're adults (I think that's a natural, normal evolution), but I do enjoy them and the g'kids so much.
I don't like the way it's gone, though, i.e., the transitory nature of life, but that's one more reason that Heaven will be spectacular...no more goodbyes.
Good thoughts, Tom.
Cathy
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