Adopted for Life: The Good Part

Oftentimes the anticipation of something exceeds reality when the reality of that something finally becomes reality. I find that to be the case for me whenever I fail to enter into the moment of reality because I'm reflecting on what I thought it was going to be, or wondering when it's eventually going to arrive. My imagination can be quite vivid, and for that I'm immensely grateful but also find discouraging. I believe I easily fall into the "Martha Syndrome" by becoming "worried and bothered about so many things", when really only "a few things are necessary, really only one,... the good part, which shall not be taken away...". (Luke 11:41b-42) I struggle most with this syndrome during the Holidays, not because they fail to be rich, full, joyful and rewarding, blessed with love from family and friends. But rather because I build up the fulfillment of these things over and above that which only a longing for Jesus can satisfy. It's then that I realize that I have completely moved 180 degrees away from what I was designed to worship. I've made the Holidays everything the world crafted them to be and nothing what God created them for; directed from Christ and to myself. And everytime I do this, whether during the Holidays or not, I'm left spiritually bankrupt, unfulfilled and longing for something deeper.

On a human level, our Christmas Holiday was absolutely perfect. Poppy screamed when she ran down the hallway, peaking around the corner near the fireplace to see if Santa had come and what he might have left behind. Willow was clueless, but certainly enjoyed the hullabaloo of wrapping paper, laughter and familiar faces. Austin, Annie and Barret nestled right into their all too familiar Holiday traditions and reflections that began long before Poppy and Willow were ever on the scene, but nonetheless basked in the moment as if the girls had always been with us from as far back as they could remember. And Victoria and I just smiled in somewhat unbelief that we were actually experiencing such a moment.

On a spiritual level, I always feel that our Christmas Holiday could be more perfect. Sometimes I fantasize (and Victoria and I have talked about this) about completely doing away with gifts and just waking up on Christmas morning, going out, serving, giving what we would have spent on gifts and donating it to something worthy. Maybe one of these days God will give me enough gumption to actually lead our family in this direction. In the meantime I truly am grateful that we have one another and that our Christmas was what it was. But I also long for a day when all I really long for is the good part, actually sitting at the feet of it and worshipping it with abundant joy and without constraint for what I am tempted to substitutionally desire. This is when anticipation meets reality, and it's only at these moments that the two ever really coalesce.